Adonai Mitchell

"Jewish" words used for names by goyim, ranked by how unlikely Jews themselves are to use them: (We've already profiled many of these!)

ISRAEL Kamakawiwo'ole, musician. At this point, the goyim have pretty much appropriated "Israel". Oh well. ALIYAH Boston, basketball player. She is not enacting the Law of Return anytime soon. HANNUKKAH Wallace, bobsledder. At least we would spell it right. SHALOM Harlow, model. Or, if you want, SHALOM Luani, football player. Works for goyishe girls and boys! RABBI Matondo, soccer player. Sure, it's pronounced "Rab-ee". As. If! TORAH Bright, snowboarder. "Tora" by itself might be fine, but once you add that "h", you're encroaching. ZAYDE Wisdom, hockey player. That's his name. Grandfather Wisdom. We're just gonna shrug. ELOHIM Prandi, handball player. Oh, Elohim is such a no-no... ADONAI Mitchell, football player. But is Elohim a bigger no-no than Adonai? How will Orthodox Jews who cover the NFL write about the wide receiver for the Indianapolis Colts? It's a real problem! JEW Don Boney, politician. No.