Barabbas

Quintus: We have a big problem. Passover is coming up.

Pilate: Oh, those matzah crumbs everywhere!

Quintus: Not just that. You know our deal with the Jews?

Pilate: Yep. We gotta pardon a prisoner, and the Jews get to pick.

Quintus: And we just captured Barabbas.

Pilate: That rabble-rouser! Just hearing his name gets my blood boiling!

Quintus: He speaks of starting a revolution!

Pilate: I know! Can you imagine? Jews taking over?

Quintus: They'll kick us back to Rome!

Pilate: I don't want to go back to Rome! I'll be a nobody in Rome!

Quintus: Well, we got that other prisoner...

Pilate: Joshua something or other...

Quintus: He is harmless.

Pilate: Harmless?

Quintus: Yeah, just wanders around in a robe and talks a bunch of gibberish.

Pilate: So why did we imprison him?

Quintus: He was spewing some nonsense. Turning water into beer, I think?

Pilate: He doesn't really?...

Qunitus: Of course not! It's some kind of a magic trick!

Pilate: We can't have that!

Quintus: Obviously, we can't, but think about it: Barabbas talks about starting a revolution. Joshua tries to get people drunk.

Pilate: So how do we get the Jews to pick Joshua?

Quintus: We pay them off!

Pilate: Of course! You know how those people love their shekels!

Quintus: Yes, we pay them off, we pardon Joshua, and that rebel Barabbas hangs!

Pilate: Maybe we crucify him?

Quintus: What a great idea! What can go wrong?