Cleopatra VII Philopator

Cleopatra, the legend, the myth, the woman who launched a thousand ships and several Roman legions. She was, to put it mildly, a mover and a shaker. Her family, the Ptolemies, were Macedonians, which makes her about as Jewish as a ham sandwich, despite ruling over a land with a significant Jewish population. One might even argue she was less Jewish than that ham sandwich, as at least the sandwich is often found near Jewish delis.

Her "Jewish origin" score is a generous nod to the fact that she was born and raised in Egypt, a country that had – and still has – Jews. However, her family tree was more entwined with her own siblings than with anything resembling a synagogue. Her liaisons with Julius Caesar and Mark Antony might have been politically astute, but they did little to advance the cause of Jewish continuity.

Kvell-worthiness, though? Oh, absolutely. She managed to keep Egypt independent and powerful for a good long while, navigated the treacherous waters of Roman politics, and did it all with a flair for the dramatic that would make a Broadway producer weep. Plus, she had a perfume named after her, probably. That’s pretty kvell-worthy. Just don't ask her to lead a Seder.