Douglas Fairbanks

Did you know that the actor who played Robin Hood, Zorro, and d'Artagnan, the so-called "King of Hollywood" was Jewish? No, not a crude hybrid of Kevin Costner, Antonio Banderas, and... Chris O'Donnell?*

No, we're talking about Doulgas Fairbanks, Sr.** Fairbanks was born Douglas Elton Ullman, and his father, Hezekiah*** Ullman, was a Jew.

Now, we're stretching it a bit here, for Hezekiah abandoned his family when Douglas was five, and it's unlikely that his Catholic mother would say kiddush. Still, we like the sound of a Jewish King of Hollywood, so no 120-years-ago indiscretions are going to stop us from claiming Fairbanks as one of our own.****

* Seriously, why hasn't there been a quality modern adaptation of "The Three Musketeers" yet? On the other hand, seeing how Hollywood butchered "The Count of Monte Cristo", that's probably for the best...

** Not to be confused with his son, Douglas Fairbanks, Jr.

*** Hezikiah? Have you ever met a Jew named Hezikiah? Then again, what do we know about the naming patterns of 1833?

**** But of course, you figured that out already.

Verdict: **Barely a Jew**.

_May 14, 2008_