Profile №8d803c
Ethan Katzberg
Verdict: Not a Jew
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The profile of goyishe snowboarder Sage Kotsenburg, written during our Olympic binge of 2014, ends with the following sentence: "Maybe if he was a Katzenberg..."
During this Olympic binge of 2024, would you take a Katzberg?
Ethan Katzberg! From British Columbia, Canada! A bear of a man at 6'7" (that's over two meters) and 236 lbs (that's over 100 kilos)!
Ethan Katzberg! Who just obliterated the hammer throw competition, winning gold so easily — even his second best throw was two meters ahead of everyone else!
Ethan Katzberg! Who is not Jewish at all...
So, yeah, we would absolutely take a gold-winning Kotsenburg or a gold-winning Katzberg, but unfortunately we can't.
Maybe if he was a Katzenberg...
Verdict: **Not a Jew**.
_August 6, 2024_
Filed May 15, 2026 · athletes-and-coaches
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