J.M.W. Turner

Joseph Mallord William Turner was, by all accounts, as English as a cloudy day and a pint of ale. Born in Covent Garden, the son of a barber and wigmaker, his lineage appears to be thoroughly British Protestant, with nary a whispered rumor of crypto-Judaism or a conveniently forgotten Sephardic ancestor.

His artistic output, while certainly kvell-worthy for its sheer genius and pioneering spirit, rarely touched upon overtly Jewish themes. While he depicted everything from classical mythology to contemporary events, and even brought a touch of the sublime to industrial scenes, synagogue interiors or depictions of biblical patriarchs (beyond the common Christian interpretations) were not his forte.

So, while his dramatic skies and turbulent seas might evoke a certain Old Testament wrath, and his ability to capture light could almost be described as divine, Turner's connection to the tribe remains firmly in the realm of nil. We're left to appreciate his masterpieces without the added bonus of a shared heritage.