Milhouse Van Houten

Why would anyone think Milhouse of Simpsons' fame was Jewish?

Well, let's see, he's short, nerdy, socially uncomfortable...

Oy. In other words, he's the animated version of Woody Allen, without the creepy sexual undertones or the talent. Wonderful.

Well, the good news is, he's not really Jewish. His parents attend church. He tells on Bart for fear of going to hell. Even the name — Milhouse. No Jew is naming their child Milhouse. We've got enough embarrassing names without having to dip into the goyishe reject pile.

So why would anyone think Milhouse is Jewish?

Short, unattractive, no self-respect...

Oy.