Alan Turing

Alan Turing was, by all accounts, a man of exceptional intellect and pioneering vision. His work at Bletchley Park during World War II was instrumental in cracking the Enigma code, an effort widely credited with shortening the war and saving countless lives. He then went on to conceptualize the "Turing machine," a theoretical model that underpins every single computer you've ever encountered, from the clunkiest mainframe to the smartphone you're holding right now.

Yet, for all his monumental contributions, Turing's personal life was tragically marred by the very society he helped to save. In 1952, he was prosecuted for homosexual acts, which were then illegal in the UK, and forced to undergo chemical castration. The irony of a nation destroying one of its greatest minds for who he loved is not lost on us.

While his contributions to theoretical computer science and artificial intelligence are undeniable, giving us plenty of kvell-worthy material, his origins and identity offered absolutely no indication of Semitic heritage. He was English through and through, meaning his biggest "heritage" was probably a good cuppa and a stiff upper lip.

So, while we might wish to claim such a genius for the tribe, alas, Alan Turing remains firmly in the "Not a Jew" camp. We'll have to settle for admiring his legacy from afar, perhaps with a side of schadenfreude for the British establishment that treated him so abominably.