Vladimir Horowitz

"There are three kinds of pianists: Jewish pianists, homosexual pianists, and bad pianists." — Vladimir Horowitz

Let's test that maxim!

Horowitz himself was Jewish, of course. No doubt about that. And he was very likely homosexual... there is enough evidence out there to suggest it, but we will leave that for our non-existent colleagues at GayOrNotGay.com. Still, he checks the Jewish box, so no need to explore further.

Feel free to play along, but here are some famous pianists:

Arthur Rubinsein: Jewish Emil Gilels: Jewish Benjamin Britten: Gay Billy Joel: Jewish Michael Feinstein: Jewish Liberace: Gay Martha Argerich: Jewish Myra Hess: Jewish Van Cliburn: Gay Vladimir Ashkenazy: Jewish Marvin Hamlisch: Jewish Elton John: Gay Artur Schnabel: Jewish Leonard Bernstein: Jewish and gay

So, if you play the piano, and you're not Jewish, and you're not gay...

Good luck?